Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Randomize