Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Randomize
