We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
