i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize