Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
