It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Randomize
