I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Randomize
