I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
