can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Randomize
