ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
