well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
