Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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