Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
i think im in europe. pls send help
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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