The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
