No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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