using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
