Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize