I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
birth control should be required to get into college
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
