if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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