Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize