I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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