I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Randomize
