no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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