He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
