Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
