yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
