well most of my day revolves around power hour
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
