After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Randomize
