Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
