Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
