Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
