If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize