OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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