Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize