real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
