Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
