i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
my penis made a compromise with my morals
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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