you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
