I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
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