I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
okay pat passed out under dana's car
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
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