The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
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