I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Drake has all the answers
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
