He asked to "fluff my boner.."
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
I woke up under a house in Key West
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