do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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