What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
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