I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
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