be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Randomize
