I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
