My balls are so social today.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
