Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
