Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
